...ThAnKsGiViNg...

Saturday, November 28, 2009

well this thanksgiving i did very well. i had to work at the hospital from 6:00 am until 2:00 pm so i took my lunch break to run home and throw the turkey in the over. so it was pretty much done when i got off of work. i made dressing, greens, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, rolls, cheesecake, yellowcake, corn, a 5 lb turkey and a 3 lbs turkey roast. it all turned out really good!! i had a few ppl over and we ate and then i had to work at the bar from 5:00 until 10:00 pm. it was nice. i was tired but it was good.

now its time for xmas. my bday is sneaking up and i want to do something fun but that prob wont happen. its the week before finals so i wont have much room to do anything exciting. but maybe i can do something fun when i get out of classes for the semester.

well at work (hospital) and i am going to try to get some real work done b/c i have to work a double shift at the bar tonight :-/

..................until next time...............

...ApPliCaTiOnS...

Friday, November 20, 2009

well i have started to spend my time filling out applications and looking for new things to do with my life for next year. so far i have looked into a few things but i have no definate offers yet. i am a little sad. a girl that i work with has applied to school and already gotten into them. but i already know why and that is something that i have to fix on my own. she didnt even want to be a doctor when she got out of school but was still offered a position. its great and i am so happy for her i just am waiting and trying to figure things out for me which sux...its ok i will one day know and when i do know and find out you will know too...LoL...

welll time to get back to the applications and essays :-/

...............until next time.............

...BiG bRoThEr...

Thursday, November 12, 2009

well for this post i would like to talk about Boss's.

the boss that i currently have at the hospital...she is a very nice person....to your face at least. God only knows the things she says when i am not around. i havt asked simple questions (well the seem simple on my part of the story) but get back nasty and rude remarks. Now one of the computers in the lab has had some problems and she left a statment saying "big brother is watcing you"...LoL

it just amazes me the things a boss can do or say. if i was a boss i want to be feared. if everyone fears you they will spend more of their time doing things right and trying not to make you mad then trying to be your friend and kiss your ass. that is what goes on here. the "full timers" have their own little circles. but sad to say they all talk just as bad about our boss (when she is not around of course) than our boss talks about them when they are not around. its a cray parallel. one that i do not like and refuse to not get mixed up in. i am not afraid to ask "why" or ask questions when i want to inquire about something. im not sure if that is intimidating or if some ppl just dont like it, but that is me and i dont care. i refuse to kiss someones ass to get something i want. i will work hard and try to get it myself. i have had to do that for years and i will not stop trying now.

good example....my hours got cut a few months ago. i asked for more. i got a rude reply saying i cant do homework or "sorority projects" on company time BUT i can play on the computer just as long as things are slow and i have no other work to do...LMAO...so you want me to screw around on the computer as opposed to do some school work? so if the CEO came in would u rather him see my head in a biology book rather than reading a gossip blog he would be happy with that? that is just a small example. i mean dont get me wrong our boss is a nice lady...but the whole boss role def has some character flaws. from what i have observed they wont change. she has been this way for years why change now? when your job is not at threat why even care? that is the attitude that i see going around.

i guess all i am asking is to be more one sided. if there is a problem ask. ok the computer is messed up. ask ppl hey did you go to a crazy web site/ if so dont do it again. no we get a threat in a memo saying "big brother is watchnig you if you have nothing to do go home..." LoL...yea i know but simple thngs such as that. not to say that i would be a better boss just trying a few suggestions to keep the break time gossip at a min...and on other ppl that dont work here. if they dont talk about lab ppl they manage to talk about someone else...LoL...i would much rather it be that way than be them talking about me.

like i said i would want to be feared....at least i will get respect, get called a bitch, but i know the work would be done and done the right way...LoL

..............until next time............

...BaRtEnDeR...

Saturday, October 31, 2009

well last night was AMAZING! it was kinda slow so i got to play bartender last night even tho it was my 3rd shift. it was alot of fun! yea i dont get to take home tips yet but this job it pretty fun. i didnt know what to expect but it was still alot of fun. LoL

i learned a fancy new trick on how to pour shots and look like a pro...and i just learned how to make different drinks in gneeral.

this job it like a double thing for me. i always wanted to try but never thought i would get the chance or have the time. and at the same time it is hard making ends meet with just the hopspital job since my hours got cut. this helpes to ensure a few extra $100 every week or so and that will help seeing as i am helping jennifer as well. but it is fun and i like it. def something different that i have never done before.

this past week has been....CRAZY! LoL yea that is all i can say. it was a good week, it was very nice. now it is time to stop slacking and get back on the grind.

well im at work (suprise suprise...LoL) so i guess ill start "working"....

.......................until next time.....................

...LiFe...

Thursday, October 22, 2009

*listening to The Fugees..."FU-GEE-LA"....

well the same ole same ole.

another week gone bay...alot of time wasted....more things done....LoL

i just cant wait to get out of here and onto the next step! it sucks being stuck in the limbo. it really does. i see all of my old friends married/engaged...one person is about to graduate with her phD! another is in there 2nd year of med school...i see all these people moving forwerd and i feel like i am stuck sometimes. i feel like i am always learning the lesson of patients. but i guess i need to focus on what the lord wants me to do for now and not just on what i want to do. that is the hardest thing to try wrap my mind around but it is true.

i got a 2nd job...finally...you know how i said i always wanted to be a bar tender....LOL...yup...prob two nights a week. the same place that erica works. i start saturday. yes i need the cash. i have to pay out the pocket (yea like alot) for tution this semester and next semester...plus the medical bills my dad has said he was paying on but is not. so i still owe alot with that. im not broke, i am just tyring to budget and stay floating. still making $, paying bills, and saving all at the same time. im big on saving...LoL...i have some $ set aside just in case but i will never be satisfied until i reach "oscillation"...LoL...

but yea i start there on saturday. i already talked to her and i get one or two days a week which is great so it should be good. make some extra cash, send money to jennifer and be good.

i am homesick but not really. i mean i really enjoy just being at home and in a familiar place and i do admit i do miss a few people. but i cant be there 2 long...LoL...i will go home for x-mas for a few days or a week but nothing to long. just long enough to go out, be seen, and leave....oh yea and go shopping!! LoL....but other than that nothing too crazy.

jennifer is good. she is not doing good in one class. she has the "truman" mentalitly ....."just as long as i pass the class i dont care"...LoL i tried to motivate her to be above that but i cant even lie i know that i have had that attitude before. and with jennifer you cant tell her anything. so i just have to let her do what she wants and hopefully it is the right thing.

well just needed to make an update.....

..............until next time...........

....PrAy...

Sunday, October 18, 2009

thats all that i seem to be doing latly.

not just for myself but other people around me who are going thru far worse things that i am right now. it is crazy just how your life can turn around in a matter of minutes. life is so unpredicatable but that is why it is called life right?

homecoming was good. went to lubbock! ha a blast...lost our show here (we went over on our time so we lost :( but the show was AMAZING) and the light did come with his brother. it was interesting. LoL. he was wasted when i finally met up with them that night and i just had to get on their level and in the right mindset and then i was good for the night. but it was a interesting weekend to say the least.

school :-/ im def getting burned out. and to think that i still have a few years ahead of me until im done :-/ LoL i just need a fresh start, a new motivation...just to get away from here and start the next chapter in my life and i will be good. i just need that newness to help my boost and to just know that i am finally almost done with what i want to achieve.

but that is all. the usual....say things diff day. living each day to try to be closer to God. taking it one step at a time.

on that note just please keep Brandon in your thoughts and prayers. he just needs it. and so does shawn. i just think these past few weeks/this month has been the month of no good for alot of people.

.................until next time.................

....ZzZzZzZzZz...

Sunday, October 4, 2009

...that is how i feel right now.... only got about 4 hours of sleep last night and the night before and had to be up at 5:30 am.....

....SaTuRdAy...

Saturday, October 3, 2009

well yet again, my hours got cut (at work) we hired two new people and who does it affect? me the part time employee....*sigh*
i feel that i work (whenever someone calls in and i work the crappy shifts that no one else wants) and i have never had a no call no show. if i am going to be late i call (and 95% of the time i am late it is b/c of a class/test that i was in so i have a good reason for being late). it is just so annoying because i feel that i do work hard and i am flexible but my boss dosnt show appreciation towards that. i refuse to kiss her ass or suck up to get the hours i want/need. i will just start looknig for a 2nd job so i will have that security and also so i wont be so flexible with this job so i can get some set days/times. i am just tired of comprimising my life and my time for people to not be treated the same way. so alli can do is pray about it and hope the good lord directs me in the right direction.

i do love AKA again (and my neos :) the step show is this weekend (THANK GOD) not that i dnt love spending late nights practicing with them i am just ready to have more time for me! and to just have the step show over with. i see why other chapters dont do it. it is very time consuming and just hard to do when you have a job and classes to worry about. but i hope we do well and i hope that we win!

he will be here this weekend :) he is coming for homecoming to see our show and of course to see me! i am really excited to see him! it has been over a month since the last time i saw him and i know we will have a great time while he is here. even tho its giong to be only for a few days i will enjoy every second of it.

i sent off my texas med school applications :) i am hopin that by the end of this week i can have my ACMS applications as well. so i am going in the right direction and i am anxious and excited to get everything sent off and done. all i can do now if pray and hope that some school likes what they see of me on paper and will accept my desire to be in medical school.

....*sigh*....

*listening to Bone Thugs & harmony...thuggish ruggish bone*
well i will make it thru the week, and i will be free! LoL

..............until next time...............

...DaRtMoUtH...

Saturday, September 19, 2009

-- Sent from my Palm Pre

....SiGh....

Friday, September 18, 2009

***listening to biggie smalls juicy****

i want to start by saying ....SiGh....

LoL

that is the kind of past few days that i have had...

1. had the MCATS on the 12th....got back on thr 13th to work, left the night of the 13th to leave for new hampshire to take jennifer to school

2.spent the weekend on the east coast spending ALOT of $ with jennifer getting stuff ready for school. i am SOOOO sad that i changed my ticket and did not stay longer so that i could actually see the school and help her. but it is ok. i will go back soon. i just think i miss her and worry about her way to much with her being so far away. but we talk so much now thruout the day that it def puts my mind 2 ease. i am excited and worried about her but i know she will do great and have alot of fun. i just think about all of the things taht i did during my freshman year and WOW...LoL...but i am happy she will finally get to grow as a person and meet new people and best of all she is out of Lubbock! not to say lubbock is bad but i feel that one needs to get away so that you learn and experience the world outside of west texas. i did it and i would nto change it for the world!

3. so jack is in jail...i tried to help but he has a 2 diff problems and he has a bond but will not be set free b/c he has a theft charge and can not be released....so i will try to send him a letter. i know he is just caught up in a web of trouble in Lubbock and wish he would have gone when he had the chance. i know that he is not happy there and he 2 needs to leave and grow by himself and he can only do that when he is not in lubbock. i cant wait until he can finally get away. until them as a friend i will try to help and support him. what are friends for right?

4. it is shaws bday on the 16th....and he is feelin the age...LoL he has called me a zillion times! but i guess he just misses me. i do miss him. he is like family and we def look after eachother. but its ok i know he will make the right choices and will enjoy his bday without me.

5. AKA...LoL...its actually not bad!!! i enjoy it and the Neo's def make this year so much more enjoyable and i found that love that i once had for the orginization. so that is good. i still hate the negative people that are around us but what can you do? just getting ready for the stepshow...after that i will be free! LoL

6. talked to him last night...he said he missed me :) yea i know!!!! i was in such a sock when he said it that i asked what he said...and he happily repeated it! LoL...but i def like him and again im taking each day for what it is. just cant wait to set a date 2 see eachother so that i can look forward to something....

7. work....AHAHAHAHAH! LoL

i do work alot...but when i think of school...bills...jennifer...i just dont want to take the time off b/c i want to be able to provide and pay for things that i need/want. so until i get things taken care of i will be on the grind in the classroom and at work :-/

8. club ball.........i lost the battle. i am now a general memeber. :-/ it was heartbeaking. i was not even given a fair chance to run for a position. but after many attempts i still was not granted my request and shal remain that. i am the founder...CEO...this team is my baby and now i have to setp back and it is so hard for me. but maybe it will be a good thing. now i can focus on other things ...hmmmm just maybe....

with that i just feel that "people" who that are apart of it should have talked to meinsted of making decisions. this week has def made me loook at the people who "come" to me...they say one thing to my face but what do they say when i am away? i am not going to please ppl anymore. i am on my own *ish now and i just am tired of trying to keep the peace. i will now become the a*s hole who will just be on my own agenda...oh well....its time to do me!

these past few days have def been a rollercoaster ride for me. i have never felt so many emotions all at once. i just dont want them to get the better of me. you know how i am about my emotions and my feelings. but its ok. glad to be alive. blessed to be here and to see each day!

last week pastor bill talked about in his sermon things such as "our plans" and the lord messing them up. but are our plans really his plans? we ask him to bless us and grant our wishes but never focus on what he might possible want us to do. and i am trying to figure that out now what he is wanting me to do rather than just what i want to do...each day is a lesson learned.

....................until next time.................