....tHe LiGhT.....

Friday, October 10, 2008

well a few days ago i heard these words...." when i see these guys and then i see you, i don't even know why you give them your time...i just think you can do so much better..."

for the past few days those words have been ringing in my head...

and you know what is so bad...well good...is that after hearing that i actually think its true. i really had to lean back and look at my past. have i been lowering my standards just to have something in my life? is it better to have nothing rather than just settling for something? questions like that keep swimming in my thoughts and it makes me realize the person that i am and what i should be looking for.

good question...what am i looking for?

my track record for guys these past few years has been very eclectic with style and personalities...i mean what is my type? its like the question that was asked to Julia Roberts in "Run away bride" when she couldn't figure out how she liked to eat her eggs....well i think i am starting to figure that out...well i am trying too at least. at this point, yes i am young and a Lil goodlooking...LoL...but to be honest i don't want the random calls or texts, i want the reliability and ownership of a meaning relationship. yes i am getting "older"...but i experience so many things each day, but yet i do know have one person that i can share that with.

I'm gonna end on this quote....
Everyone walks down the road of rejection and resentment...that is when you pick up your pride, dust it off, and find something BETTER!

that is dedicated to YOU...the headliner...the beginning act...the whole show...and the after party...

i bid fair well...you can be selfish but not on my time...I'm sad it just took me this long to realize it...what was i holding on too? hopes, ambitions, what ifs? yea i think that's it...and while you were too busy not having time for me...I'm sure you made plenty of time for her....LoL..its OK...when you seem me years from now, living my dream....i wont be able to resist asking the question do you wish you were the man on my side...holding me down...most importantly living our dream off of my 6 or 7 figure salary checks? LMAO...oh well, you live, you learn, you make mistakes...but never...no regrets...from your biggest fan, to someone i cant even understand....this is to you, here is your kiss on the forehead....and my best wishes to you....

......until next time....