....WoW...

Sunday, September 28, 2008

well this is the start of the 6th week of school...and itfeels like we have been in school for 12 weeks. my classes are ok...I AM READY FOR THE STEP SHOW TO BE OVER!!!! LoL...i am ready to have my life back...the step show is this weekend so i am ready for it to be done with. it takes up so much of my time, and the thanx that i get...NOTHING


i need a vacation...somewhere away from here. i was/am seriously thinking of moving far far away when i graduate. go somewhere new....fresh start...after these past few weeks i really want to. i have no reason to stay in the midwest. i def dont have somone to stay here for....so why not. a new adventure for my life after truman.


some days i just feel so alone. i mean yea i have my roomies and aubrie and my sorority sisters...but i just get tired of tellingthem things and i know that honestly they dont understand or cant relate...

latly for some strange reason ive been thinking about douglas alot. im not sure why. and it just sux...i dont like having him on my mind. i know that i am the last person that he is thinking about. ijust want to be appreciated and have someone i can come home to. someone who isnt after me just for certain things but who honestly cares and wants to know about me. maybe one day. i keep thinking that maybe i have a curse or something...but i know that i have a history of wanting things right when i want them...and God always makes me learn the meaning of patients over again. good things come to those who wait...right? i hope so! well gonna go eat and start some homework...

......................until next time...............

....nO mOrE cOmPlAiNinG....

Sunday, September 14, 2008

well i am back and in full affect

took my MCATS yesterday...this is how i feel about it..... :-/
LoL

well i had to drive to springfield,mo to take my test b/c i yet again was a procrastinator and i signed up too late to get a seat anywhere close to my area. so i had to drive 5 hours just to take the test, not to mention get a hotel room and buy gas...ooh but i did go shopping before i left and that made me feel so much better!

on my way bad, someone (who i said iw ould not say his name anymore nor talk about...but i feel i have to b/c it is the turning point)...was in columbia. well i had to drive thru columbia to get to kirksville. so i text and asked if i could meet him somewhere to say hi and just to show him my new car and so on and so forth...he says yes...well so i get 10 miles from columbia and call...straight to voicemail...so i first get mad...yes i was mad...so i decided i need to get gas i will call when i hit the city b4 i get gas so i can decided what to do next. so i get further into town, pull into the gas station, fill up...and call again. this time it rings a few times and then goes to voicemail (which means he pressed the ignore button...we have the same phone so yea...i know the deal)...so i send him a text...no reply, so i pull out of the gas station and just head back to kirksville. ok, now if you were going to be busy or just didnt want to see me fine TELL ME...dont play games. who knows what he was doing and to be honest i dont care. he has disappointed me for the last time. and i think it finally hit that why harbor feelings for someone when the feeling is not returned? why waste my time to show interest when it is just ignored? i fell that i am a good person, with a good head on my shoulders, ad a bright future, why should i even tolerate to be treated this way? so its official...i give up. im not going to try anymore. yes there were alot of reasons why i did like him but to be honest right now its not worth it anymore. im tired of getting my feelings hurt and not being appreciated for the things that i do try to do for him. to be honest i should be trying this hard to get any man...he should be the one chasing after me. oh well guess its back to square one...and im ok with that. i would rather be alone and looking than just sitting around and waiting for no good reason. "im too fly to be depressed"...LoL

but on a lighter note classes are ok...school is just school....im still tired of certain people...i guess i will never understand some people but i guess that is just the law of the land.

ooooh we HAD a mouse...toya saw it...i called the landlord and he brought over sticky paper...and within 30 min he was caught...i was in springfield when all this was going on, but im just glad its gone! i think i saw it once a long time ago, but just the idea of it being n the house....eeeew....the landlord said its possible b/c of all the rain. we dont leave food out and most of our fresh stuff in in the fridge...so i guess that would be a good reason.

i might get to see iowa next week...LoL yes i know...but its fun to see him

well thats all i got...
.......until next time......

....wEeK 2....

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

well this is the middle of week 2 for classes...and IT SUX! i have so much homework on top of working and all the meeting i have to go to with the different orginizations im in...its just crazy!!! so far i am doin pretty good..yesterday was a bad day :-/...but i got thru it...just had a freak out about the MCATS...in which i am takin sept 13th...my last time b4 i registar for med school...*sigh*...we will just have to see what happens....took a 5 min study break..gotta get back to studyin anatomy...i have a test friday!!!!


....until next time....